


You Don't Need Me

by Leloi



Category: Star Trek, Star Trek: Alternate Original Series (Movies)
Genre: Artificial Uterus, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/M, Forced Abortion Attempted, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Mpreg, Pregnancy, Vulcan Bonds
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-08-02
Updated: 2013-08-02
Packaged: 2017-12-22 06:04:17
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 12,887
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/909784
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Leloi/pseuds/Leloi
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Alien technology creates a new life... but the "father" of the child is in a relationship with someone else.  What will James Kirk do?  Written in Reboot-verse but before Into Darkness.</p>
            </blockquote>





	You Don't Need Me

**Author's Note:**

> Also posted to the Spirk Archive.
> 
> There is one moment of threatened forced abortion.

“You’re pregnant.” 

“Pregnant?” James T Kirk gaped at his friend and doctor. “How the hell can I be pregnant? I’m a man, damnit!”

“Well apparently gender holds no bounds for alien technology. You, kid, have a bun in the oven. Mazeltov!”

Kirk frowned and rubbed his face in his hands. “Look… the last time I had sex you walked in on it back at the academy. I haven’t done anything since then. It’s been well over a year now, almost two… so there’s no possible way this can be happening.”

“Yeah… thanks for reminding me.” McCoy muttered, going through his test results. “But it’s happening. You’re pregnant, Jim.”

“So… how’d it happen? Did I just clone myself or is there another species involved?”

Bones looked over his PADD. “Here’s the thing… as far as I can tell it’s only half human. The other half is some other species. I don’t know what yet… there’s too little DNA to test. We’ll wait a week and try again… provided you wish to keep it.”

Kirk stared down at his hands, remembering the odd flash of light and vision he had seen when he passed out planet-side. “Yeah… I think I do.”

“Thanks. Now I have to brush up on my pre-natal and maternity care.” Bones muttered. 

“Can I go now?” Kirk asked.

Bones sighed, looking at the man who had just received unexpected news. But this was Jim Kirk, he dealt with ten kinds of unexpected news before breakfast. “You’re free to return to duty. But I want you back here if you feel anything weird… or when the reality of your situation hits you. Come back here. That’s an order.”

Silently Kirk hopped down from the bio-bed and left without a word.

“Only you…” McCoy sighed, shaking his head.

^.~

Jim Kirk gave the matter no more thought for a week. His ship and her crew kept him distracted enough. Only when he was curled up in bed did he give any thought to the vision he had had. There was no way he would think inappropriate thoughts about his First Officer while he was around said officer on the bridge or in the rec room playing chess, especially since said officer had a girlfriend. When the week was up McCoy reminded him about the test to find out the paternity species of the child he carried. But Kirk had a feeling he already knew.

^.~

“Greetings, T’hy’la.” 

Kirk stared back at the one who stood before him in surprise. “Spock?”

The Vulcan smiled… actually SMILED. Kirk had to remind himself that only Spock’s older counterpart smiled. This was not that counterpart but another version. He looked to be only a decade older than his First Officer and he wore a different uniform. “I forgot you were so young when this happened. Please forgive me.”

“For what?” Kirk asked.

“You are about to experience something incredible. Please be strong, Ashayam. I promise it will be worth it.”

“I don’t understand. Spock? Are you from the future?”

The Vulcan smiled again. “Yes. I am here to bring you a gift.”

“What gift?”

Spock reached out and Kirk mirrored him. Their fingers touched and Kirk felt a spark zap through his body, settling in his groin. “What?” But Spock was gone. Once again Kirk found himself in the ruins he and the away team were exploring.

“Captain?” His Spock stood nearby, running a tricorder over him.

“What is it, Spock?”

“Are you alright? For two point seven minutes you froze.”

Kirk stared back at his First Officer, ever the example of Vulcan control. “I’m fine. I thought I saw something.”

“Perhaps you should visit Dr. McCoy when we return to the ship.” Spock offered helpfully.

“Of course. Thank you, Spock.”

Spock nodded in answer, returning to where he had been when he noticed his Captain had frozen.

“Spock?”

Spock turned around and faced his Captain. “Yes, Captain?”

“What is… Ashayam?” 

Spock’s eyes crinkled around the edges. “Where did you hear that word?”

Kirk shrugged. “Somewhere… It’s Vulcan, isn’t it? What does it mean?”

“It means ‘beloved.’” Spock continued to stare back at Kirk as if to try and understand Kirk’s interest.

Kirk felt his heart flutter in his chest at the thought of a future Spock calling him ‘Beloved.’ What of Uhura? How did he and Spock get together? “Um… thank you.” Silently he returned to his work, stunned.

^.~

McCoy read the scanner results with a twist of his lips which meant he was deep in thought, especially when accompanied by a furrowed brow. 

Kirk stared at his friend, knowing by Bones’ expression he didn’t like the readout. “That bad?” 

“It’s Vulcan DNA.” Bones stated. “How the hell did you get Vulcan DNA? You know what? Never mind. I don’t want to know.”

Kirk bowed his head, his suspicions confirmed. “Don’t run a paternity test.”

“What do you mean ‘don’t run a paternity test’? Does this mean you already know the father?

Nodding a moment, Kirk glanced up at McCoy and then shook his head. “I don’t need to know.”

“How the hell can you say that?”

“It was alien technology, wasn’t it? Whoever the father is they had nothing to do with this.”

“They should know that alien technology used their DNA to plant a child in you.” Bones replied, crossing his arms. 

Kirk shook his head. “It… it doesn’t matter, does it?” But Kirk’s reply was met with deeper scorn. “Bones… he’s happy. I have no right to intrude on that.”

“So you think you know what potent Vulcan Seed knocked you up?” 

Kirk nodded. 

“You’ll have to tell the crew. They have to be made aware of your ‘delicate condition.’” Bones returned to his PADD. “You’ll need vitamins and minerals. Copper. And no more away missions. You’re responsible for another life as well as your own.”

Kirk lightly touched his abdomen in a strangely maternal moment. “I know. Thanks.”

“I’m your friend, Jim. I’ll stand by you.”

^.~

Kirk looked around the room at all of his senior officers. “I guess this news can’t wait for long… due to circumstances…” His eyes fell on Spock for a moment and he felt a longing ache deep within his chest. Aware that he was staring too long his eyes flicked to Sulu before settling on Bones. “Um…” A deep blush graced his cheek as he stood and stared blankly at the table. “I don’t know how to say this.”

“Just say it, Keptin.” Chekov replied. 

“I’m with child.”

Everyone around the table looked to their neighbor to check that they had heard right. The only one who didn’t was McCoy who sat with a small smile of support should Kirk look his way. 

“I’m sorry, Captain. Do we take it to mean you have fathered a child?” Uhura asked. All eyes turned to Kirk.

“No. Not exactly. I’m the mother if you can call it that.” A hand lightly caressed his lower abdomen and he seemed to draw strength from that because he looked up and addressed the table. “I’m pregnant. Alien technology zapped me and… and several months from now there will be a little one running around… um, well not running around right away but you know what I mean.”

“Fascinating.” Spock stated.

“So… who’s the father?” Scotty asked.

Kirk glanced at McCoy a moment and then shrugged. “I don’t know. The tests are inconclusive.”

“You should be able to map the DNA. At least the paternal species can be deduced.” Spock stated.

“Alright… yeah… we already did that.” Kirk replied despite Bones’ warning gestures. 

“And…?” Scotty asked.

Kirk shut his eyes and braced himself. “Vulcan.” The room went still and Kirk kept his eyes closed until he heard McCoy shift in his seat. “So… there it is. Unless there are any questions you’re excused.” The room remained silent, still in shock. Finally Kirk opened his eyes and offered a casual grin. “You may discuss it with the rest of the crew. They are going to find out anyway it may as well be from you. Mr. Spock you have the Bridge.” And with that Kirk left the room as quickly as possible. “That went well.” 

Bones frowned when he caught up with his friend. “I thought you weren’t going to tell him.”

“He doesn’t know it’s his.” Kirk replied.

“That’s not what I saw. He had a deer caught in headlights moment. Uhura gave him a bad case of stink eye. The rest looked bewildered and you had your goddamn eyes shut!”

“Hey! I’m a delicate vessel of virgin birth. I don’t need to see stink eye!”

“Virgin my ass! I saw what you were doing back in your academy days. Your virginity doesn’t grow back, you know.”

“What I mean is… This is kindof an intense personal experience, you know? I don’t need the stress of my officers judging me for something I have no control over, especially since it’s about my body and not my performance. I didn’t do anything wrong. I was just in the wrong place at the wrong time.”

McCoy reached out and patted Kirk on the shoulder. “You’re right. If they ever bother you make sure to send them my way. 

“That’s why I love ya.” Kirk grinned. 

“I’m not marrying you.” 

The blond laughed as he walked down the hall with his friend.

^.~

It only took a day for Spock to corner his captain alone. “May I speak to you, Captain?”

Kirk sighed and crossed his arms over his chest. “If you insist, Mr. Spock…”

“I do.” Spock replied, his hands held behind his back. “Your child is of Vulcan descent? Does this mean that you and my counterpart have been…?”

Kirk held out his hands as if to physically stop Spock from continuing. “Hold it right there! I’m not with your counterpart in any way, Spock. Yes, I like him and he likes me but the only thing we’ve shared was that mind meld on Delta Vega.”

Spock seemed to pale at Kirk’s defense. “Forgive me, Captain. I should not have made assumptions of your relationship with my counterpart.”

“It’s… alright.” Kirk replied, lowering his hands to his sides. 

“May I ask who fathered your child?”

Kirk stared back at the Vulcan for a long moment, before staring down at his abdomen in thought. “It was on that planet… when I froze and you noticed? I saw… someone. Someone came to me from a different time. They said they had forgotten how young I had been… A gift.” Gently Kirk caressed his belly. “They called this child a gift… and they called me that word I asked you about… ashay?”

“Ashayam.” Spock replied quietly.

“Yeah that. They told me to be strong that this was all worth it.”

“Your future Vulcan mate appeared to you and left you with child?” Spock asked carefully.

Kirk brightened a moment and smiled. “Yeah… He did.” His hands protectively covered his stomach. 

“Have you met him yet?”

“Yes… Is that all, Commander?” 

Spock opened his mouth as if he wished to say more but after a careful glance into Kirk’s eyes he looked away. “Yes. Thank you, Captain.”

Kirk stepped away before he did something foolish like throw himself at Spock. “See you later!” Quickly he made his way down the hall.

^.~

News of the captain’s pregnancy quickly ran through the whole ship. It didn’t take very long before Starfleet headquarters heard the news of the blessed event. “Jim…” Pike sighed as he regarded the younger man.

“I haven’t done anything wrong, Chris.” Kirk replied somewhat defensively. “I was minding my own business on an away mission when a beam of light and someone from the future told me something was going to happen to me. No one else saw anything… and all he did was touch my hand, I swear!”

“I read the report, Jim… I don’t doubt your story. The technology involved to create such a… well it doesn’t exist yet as far as I know. But that’s not why I called.”

“What is it?” Kirk slumped in the chair at his desk.

“The Vulcans…”

“What about them?”

“They are an endangered species now, Jim. This child or any child with Vulcan blood is very important to them and their culture.”

“So?”

“Do you know the identity of the baby’s father?” Pike asked wearily.

Kirk froze. “It’s… it’s not that easy, Chris… the father is my future mate. Right now he’s… we’re… just friends.”

“I wouldn’t bother you about this, Jim… but I’ve been told that the birth and raising of this child will be of great interest to whatever clan he or she is born into. I’m being pressured to supply that name. They only want to help, Jim. They don’t want to take away your child but they do want to accept him or her into the right clan. You don’t have to do this alone.”

“But if I tell you who the father is… then he will know. He’s in another relationship and he’s happy.” Kirk stared down at his fingers. 

“Only his clan has to know for now. Can you at least tell me the name of his clan elder?” Pike pressed. 

Kirk caressed his belly a moment, unsure. Really he didn’t want Spock to find out. But… the baby had a right to know their father’s culture. “T’Pau.”

“T’Pau? Isn’t that Spock’s—?”

“The clan elder is T’Pau.” Kirk stated, staring at Pike.

“I’m… sorry Jim. I will let Elder T’Pau know of her… newest clan addition.”

“Thank you.” Kirk replied.

“Take it easy, Jim. We’ll work with you on your pregnancy. There’s no need to worry about your career.”

“Thanks.” Kirk replied.

“Cheer up, Jim! You’re about to become a father! I’ll be a grandfather…” Pike chuckled.

Kirk allowed a small chuckle. “Thanks, Chris.”

“No problem, kid. Keep me informed.”

When the monitor went dark Kirk stared at it for several minutes, unsure what else to do.

^.~

Kirk found himself kneeling over a very comfortable cushion, just the right shape for this sort of activity. A touch on his thigh reminded him of where he was and why he was there. The leader of the Helshelian people lightly caressed his naked backside, appreciating his contours. Nearby McCoy and Spock stood along with the leader’s mate and one of its counselors, all present to witness the ritual event to seal the treaty. 

Kirk returned his focus to his friends who stood in silent testament of his participation despite their opposition to the event. All at once he found himself being filled from behind and he shut his eyes, slumping forward as the leader began to slowly fuck him.

^.~

“The Helshelian people are a hermaphroditic species. Their culture is heavily infused with sexuality. Casual encounters as well as formal and personal are all out in the open. Some cultures shake hands, the Helshelians have sex. We are being asked to negotiate a treaty and one of us will be expected to take one for the team to seal the deal.” Kirk slouched in his chair, staring at his senior staff. Nausea had been brutal that afternoon and he was really in no mood to brief his staff on the Helshelian negotiation, but he had a job to do despite his progressing pregnancy. “They want someone of status to be the one their leader… does this with. That someone may chose two alternates to witness the event. As captain this probably falls to me.”

“Oh God, Jim!” Bones moaned. “Surely command understands that your condition should preclude you from this… whatever it is.” 

“Doctor McCoy is correct. Perhaps it would be beneficial for you to step down and allow either myself or the doctor to take your place.”

Kirk looked up from where he had been focused on the table to rid himself of his morning sickness. “That’s very sweet, Mr. Spock, but I’m sure Uhura would never forgive me.” 

McCoy lifted his hands. “Don’t look at me!”

“That leaves me.” Kirk breathed in through his nose and out through his mouth. 

McCoy glanced at his captain sideways before producing a hypo to stab in his neck. “Oh for God’s sake, Jim! Just ask for a damn hypo to end the morning sickness!”

Kirk jumped a little in his seat and rubbed at the spot, glaring at his friend a moment but secretly thankful the sickness was past. “Anyway… My choices for witnesses are…”

“Captain!” Spock spoke up. “There must be another way. You are with child…”

“Spock… pregnant people have been having sex since the dawn of time.” Bones rolled his eyes. “As long as I make sure the captain is free from STIs he should be fine.”

“That’s not what I meant.” Spock scowled a moment. “Your child has a link to you. You also have a preliminary link to their father, your future mate. Engaging in coitus outside of the link is…”

Kirk slammed his hand down on the table. “Yes, thank you, Mr. Spock. However I should point out to you that I am very much single right now.”

“Pre-linked bonds are still sacred to my people, Captain.”

“Yes, well… My future mate happens to be linked to someone else right now. So obviously our bond isn’t all that sacred yet. You may join me in the negotiations and stand witness but please don’t lecture me about links and bonds right now.”

^.~

Kirk took a deep breath, feeling himself stretched for the first time in years. The Helshelians may regard pregnancy as sacred, but they certainly didn’t hold back. His hands gripped at the ergomatic fuck pillow as he clenched his teeth to hold back screams. Somewhere to his right he could hear McCoy’s tricorder monitoring his condition. 

“Breathe, Jim, breathe.” Bones whispered. 

Kirk let out air and gasped anew. 

Behind the captain the Helshelian leader gave out a loud groan, pushing into Kirk with one more thrust. Sated he pulled away and stood. “The negotiations are complete. The Federation has our support.” 

Kirk managed to turn around, looking up at the leader. “We look forward to being your ally.” 

The leader smiled at him and held out his hand to pull Kirk up onto his feet. “It has been a long time since I was with someone so tight. How long has it been since your last bedding?” 

Kirk blushed and looked away. “We don’t talk about stuff like that in our culture. If you must know… my last lover was a few years ago.”

“Ah… someone who has not had a lover for a few years… we regard them as new virgins. But I am confused. Surely you need to bed to make offspring?” The leader indicated Kirk’s abdomen.

“It was… alien technology.” Kirk replied, blushing a bit under the Helshelian’s scrutiny. “I’ve never bedded my baby’s father. He doesn’t want me.”

“To never share in the pleasures of the flesh with the one who fathered your child… is sad to us.”

“Yeah? Well… it is what it is.” Kirk tried to smile. Glancing back at his officers he blushed anew. “May I get dressed now?”

“A moment more… I find your form pleasing.” 

Kirk turned a deeper shade of red. “Thank you.

The leader walked around Kirk, accessing him from every angle. “Most pleasing. If I was without a mate I would want you.”

As the three made their way back to the transporter beam out spot, Kirk nudged McCoy playfully. “See? THEY called me a virgin.”

“Shut up. I already have to deal with your sore ass in my medical bay when we get back.”

^.~

Kirk sat at his desk in his quarters, looking over a PADD. There was too much work and he was beginning to feel tired earlier in the evening. Bones had reassured him that was normal in pregnancy. The hormones, morning sickness (that actually happened in the afternoon) and the exhaustion were really beginning to get to him. 

The door chime rang and he looked up. “Come in.”

Spock came in and stood at parade rest, hands behind his back. “How are you feeling?”

Kirk sat back a bit on his chair. “You’re asking about my feelings?”

“I was referring to your pain from this afternoon’s activities.”

“Oh that.” Kirk waved the concern away. “I’m fine. Just a little rusty, that’s all.”

“You stated that your last coitus had been several years ago.”

Kirk stared up at the Vulcan, unsure. “Yeah, when I was back at the academy I had a boyfriend. We broke up ages ago… he was on one of the ships Nero destroyed at Vulcan.”

“I grieve with thee.”

“He was an asshole. Self centered, smug and selfish… a little bit sadistic. It was my first real relationship. I thought he loved me but… well… he only wanted to bag George Kirk’s son.” Kirk gave a sad smile remembering Gary.

Spock seemed to stare over Kirk’s shoulder for a long moment. “You told the Helshelian Leader that your child’s father does not want you.”

Uncomfortable, Kirk looked away. “Yeah… I did.”

“Do you believe that?”

Kirk shrugged and shook his head. “The only other man I’ve ever been with didn’t really want me. Right now my baby’s father has no clue he’s even a father. I won’t tell him. He has his own life to live right now. What right do I have to intrude on him when it was his future self that impregnated me? And even then… if he did… it wouldn’t be because of me but because he’ll feel… obligated as a father.” With a sigh Kirk finally met Spock’s eyes. “He’s happy, Spock. The life he has now… he’s happy. I have no right to intrude on that. The future isn’t set in stone. So much can change. He’s in love. He’ll probably just bond with his love.” Kirk nearly tossed down his PADD. “And you know what? It’s probably some alternate future self that knocked me up… so it really doesn’t matter what this universe’s version feels because I’ll never mate with him anyway.”

Spock stared at his captain, eyebrow raised. “You lack self confidence.”

“Only when it comes to relationships… otherwise I’m confident in spades.” Kirk stood and stretched. “Now if you’ll excuse me… Junior thinks it’s time to sleep. Ow!” With a gasp Kirk leaned forward, touching his belly.

Quickly Spock was at his side. “Shall I contact Doctor McCoy?”

“No… no… I just felt… movement. It’s a little early for that, though.” Experimentally Kirk touched his belly.

“Your child is part Vulcan. Vulcan fetuses develop much quicker than their human counterparts. May I?” Spock indicated Kirk’s belly.

Without thinking Kirk nodded. And the moment Spock touched his belly he knew it had been a mistake.

Spock froze, his eyes wide as his mind automatically linked with the developing child. Closing his eyes he stood, pulling his hand away to take a deep breath. “T’Pau will need to know…”

“She already does.” Kirk replied. “Pike informed me a couple of weeks ago about the clan thing and I told him to tell her.”

“She already knows.” Spock repeated, his voice sounded hollow.

“This changes nothing… Spock. I understand. You love Uhura. She loves you. You’re together. I understand that. I don’t need anything.”

Spock stared back, eyes wide, almost fearful. 

“Besides… it wasn’t YOU. It was some future alternate self you. He looked a few years older. Some future alternate Spock… like the other Spock but much, much younger.”

“The child is mine.” Spock finally found his voice again.

Kirk held up his hands, imploringly. “Spock… please don’t… Forget this, please? Go back to your life with Uhura.” Again the child moved as if agitated. “Please Spock… Pretend the child is someone else’s.”

“I cannot pretend…” Spock whispered. “I cannot unlearn what I have learned. The child… recognizes his father. His mind calls to me.”

“It’s a boy?” Kirk asked quietly.

Spock stared back at Kirk, something akin to anger and sadness in his eyes.

“Just… just go! Dismissed! Whatever… get out!” Kirk turned away.

Silently Spock left the room.

^.~

It was easy for Kirk to avoid Spock, especially since he had final say for the duty roster. Different shifts on the bridge meant they didn’t even have to come in contact with the other. The captain felt he had said everything he could say. All that was left to do was to leave Spock and Uhura on the same shifts so they could be together as they should be without his own interference. No doubt Spock told Uhura… confirmed for her what she probably had been suspecting all along. And honestly Kirk just got tired earlier. Of course now he woke up early having to pee and throw up… not always in that order. Sometimes it seemed gamma shift suited his needs better.

McCoy tried to tempt him out of his quarters for part of alpha shift, especially when he kept scheduling exams. “I’m not getting up in the middle of the God damn night just to examine you!” He had said on more than one occasion. “If you must know it’s damaging to morale on this ship, Jim. No one gets to see you but gamma shift. They want to see their captain.”

Kirk sighed as he played with his fork in the mess hall. Bones had dragged him out to lunch before his mid afternoon nap. “Well I can’t help that this baby is a night owl, Bones.”

“Baby my ass! You’re just avoiding a certain Vulcan!” McCoy replied. “Eat your broccoli!”

“Yes, Mother.” Kirk sulked, chewing on the limply overcooked, green vegetable. 

“Knock it off or I’ll kick your ass!” 

At that moment Uhura walked in. Immediately Kirk hunkered down over his lunch, pretending not to be there but the linguist had seen him. “You!” Pointing a well manicured fingernail at Kirk she snarled. “I have half a mind to kick your ass!”

Kirk finally looked up. “Well you’re going to have to wait your turn. Bones has promised to kick it first.”

“How dare you!” Uhura hissed.

Kirk looked around at the faces that had turned to look at them. “Maybe we should go someplace quieter?”

“It’s HIS child, you ghurtinza floozer!” 

Kirk blinked. “I have no idea what you just said.”

“Maybe you should think about the fact that he is part of an endangered species before you go denying him access to his child!”

Finally Kirk had enough. “I’m doing this for YOU, Lieutenant. You both have a relationship I cannot touch. I don’t want to touch it or break it or pressure either one of you to do anything! He’s YOUR boyfriend!” Kirk pulled away from where he had been standing close enough to snarl in a near whisper. “THIS is why I didn’t want him to know.”

Uhura slapped him, her nails scratching into his cheek. Kirk stared back at her, his hormones swimming, wanting to either hit her back or run away and cry. Instead he walked away and left the mess to return to his quarters, hastening his step when he was a fair distance away so no one would know he was running away from his baby’s father’s girlfriend.

^.~

“Jim…”

“Go away, Bones.” Kirk replied from underneath a pile of blankets on his bunk. 

McCoy sighed heavily and sat down at the edge of the bunk. “You know you can press charges… attacking a superior officer is almost grounds for mutiny.”

“I said I don’t want to talk about it.”

McCoy rubbed his face. “Come on, Jim… we both know it’s the hormones talking. You’re pregnant… you feel vulnerable… your rival just bitch slapped you a challenge and you don’t feel worthy enough to stand your ground because your hormones are screaming at you to hide away and protect your unborn child. It’s what nature designed hormones for… to not only aid in the baby’s development but to remind us that we are all animals working on instinct, especially when it comes to birthing our offspring.” Gently the doctor reached out and rubbed Kirk’s back. “Come on, kiddo. You know I’m on your side.”

Finally Kirk’s golden head emerged from under the blankets, eyes puffy and four parallel welts running across his cheek.

McCoy calmly ran the dermal regenerator until the welts were gone. “There we go… back to your usual beautiful self.”

“This is why I don’t want to be around them right now.”

“You shouldn’t have told Spock.”

Kirk sat up, indignant. “I didn’t tell him… he was there when the baby moved and he found out when he checked on them. Their mind reached out to his and he just… knew.”

“Well… maybe it was better that he knew. Jim, this self sacrifice bullshit has got to stop! You’re going to have a baby, Spock’s baby. You both have to deal with that. It doesn’t matter that it was future alien technology that caused the blessed even to take place… the kid is coming and you’re going to have to find a way to work with their father, whether it be in a relationship or not. If Spock wants to be part of their life… go for it. I’m sure it’s tough as hell raising a baby hobgoblin with all their mind voodoo. It would be really helpful to have an adult hobgoblin guide you along the terrible twos… or whatever they have.”

“I just… feel really bad. He and Uhura… They love each other. It should have been them this happened to… not me.”

“Look… Gary was a complete and utter asshole for what he did to you… but Spock isn’t Gary. He won’t intentionally hurt you because I’ve seen him protect you on away missions… he feels obligated to protect you so I seriously doubt he’s going to do something cruel or spiteful. If he wants to help you out… then let him. If Uhura wants to be a bitch about it… then that’s his department to deal with.” 

Kirk nodded sullenly, staring at the blankets covering his knees.

“But cheer up! When we get to Risa next week I’ll buy you whatever you want… just no alcohol.”

Kirk smiled softly.

^.~

The week leading up to Risa Kirk kept out of the way of both Spock and Uhura. Sometimes he couldn’t really help it and he’d find himself on the receiving end of Uhura’s glare. 

Not that he blamed her. Kirk told himself over and over that she was merely marking her territory or acting as mother hen to her boyfriend’s interests. Spock was a member of an endangered species… all those of Vulcan descent were being accounted for. It was only natural to be concerned about the child’s relationship to his clan… or the concerns of the biological father.

Really Kirk didn’t mean to shut Spock out of the development of their child (if it really was his and not some alternate universe Spock). But really he didn’t want to burden or force Spock out of his relationship with Uhura prematurely. It wasn’t Spock’s fault that some other version of himself slipped back in time to impregnate his Captain while he was still dating Uhura. What did Uhura hope? To adopt the child as her own to raise with Spock?

Kirk shivered, the thought passed like ice water over his head. Alone in his bunk he pondered Uhura’s motive. Is that what Uhura wanted? To force him to give up the child so she and Spock could have the baby to themselves?

The slap was nothing… he had received far worse in the course of duty… heck, Cupcake had done far worse. The crew was young with plenty of testosterone. Had they been older perhaps there would have been less of a rough and tumble attitude… but really they were barely even adults, stepping in when those of more experience had been killed at Vulcan. They acted like dramatic teenagers because only a few short years before they had been dramatic teenagers… Hell, Chekov was STILL a teenager.

It was too soon to think about babies or jealous girlfriends or clueless crushes. The baby drained most of Kirk’s energy so it was time to sleep.

^.~

The table Kirk sat at was in the sunshine as per doctor’s orders… or as much he could understand as doctor’s orders with Bones running off to heal an ensign who had contracted a nasty case of green balls. 

But the sun was good, even though it wasn’t Sol. Time spent on a starship meant that Vitamin D came artificially. It felt good to bake his skin and sip a cool drink watching people walk by.

Across the promenade Kirk could see Spock and Uhura seated together, dining at a local eating establishment. It wasn’t that Kirk was spying on them… to be fair he and Bones had picked their table before the commander and lieutenant had arrived. 

“I was unaware that human males could gestate offspring.”

Kirk looked up at a tall figure in robes. It was a Vulcan… male. “They can’t… Not usually anyway. I was zapped by some alien technology.” Kirk started at the Vulcan, curious as to whom he was.

“I am S’Lar… may I sit with you?”

“Of course.” Kirk kicked out McCoy’s chair so S’Lar could take it. “How did you know I’m pregnant?”

S’Lar sat down and regarded Kirk a moment. “The child is Vulcan. Your scent and the child’s thoughts are broadcast to any Vulcan within three meters.”

Kirk played with the condensation on his glass. “Oh. I didn’t know.”

“You must be in the second cycle.”

“I am in my second trimester if that’s what you mean.”

“May I ask… where is your mate?”

Kirk’s eyes glanced at where Spock sat before settling on S’Lar. “I don’t have one.” 

S’Lar showed a moment of confusion. “The child… knows its father…”

“I mean… I’m not bonded to the baby’s father. He has a girlfriend.” Kirk took another sip of his drink, suddenly feeling a little cold. “It was an accident.”

“Then perhaps you would like to come with me?”

Kirk raised an eyebrow. “Are you serious? I didn’t think Vulcans did casual sex.”

S’Lar stared back at him. “Many have lost their mates. It is logical to search for compatibility wherever we can.”

Glancing again at an oblivious Vulcan first officer, Kirk nodded. “I suppose.”

S’Lar stood and held out his hand. “Come. There is an alley around the corner.”

“An alley? Kinky!” Kirk followed the Vulcan, leaving behind his drink. Anything in an alley had to be a quickie. A few seconds later he found himself pressed against a beige wall with a forceful Vulcan kissing him, fingers eagerly pulling away Kirk’s clothing. Shimmying out of his shirt and pants Kirk didn’t really care that he was naked as long as the person with him continued to kiss and lick. With nibbles S’Lar worked his way down his body and swallowed Kirk’s organ. It had been ages since his last fellatio and his body was enthusiastically enjoying the attention. It helped that the one performing said act had the same bowl cut and pointy ears as someone else he desired. 

Throwing back his head, Kirk moaned in satisfaction, hoping to forget his own problems and enjoy the encounter for what it was. “Fuck… that feels good.” 

Something pressed against his abdomen almost painfully. S’Lar stopped his ministrations and pulled away. Finally Kirk opened his eyes and looked down at the phaser pressed into his flesh. Confused he looked to S’Lar.

“I have this set on stun. It won’t kill you but it will kill the half breed you carry. You who are unmated, you are not worthy to carry one of my kin.” A hand was slapped over Kirk’s mouth before he could protest. “It is illogical to struggle. I can easily set this to kill. I will lift this burden from you.” S’Lar practically covered Kirk’s body with his own robed figure, obscuring the phaser from anyone passing the alley. “Prepare yourself.”

Panic filled Kirk’s senses and within him the baby moved as if feeling the pressure of the phaser. This was very bad.

S’Lar kept his hand on Kirk’s mouth, phaser pressed deeper against the human’s abdomen. Kirk tried to project his thoughts to the Vulcan, knowing skin contact allowed for telepathy. “Don’t do this. PLEASE don’t do this. Don’t take him away from me. He’s all I have…”

S’Lar hissed quietly, glancing at the mouth of the alley as someone crossed by and paused as if to regard them. “I burn…” S’Lar growled.

“Please don’t… please… This is illogical. Can’t you see it’s illogical?” Kirk was beginning to get a headache from trying to project his thoughts outward. The figure at the mouth of the alley slowly approached and Kirk strained to look to the side to see who it was. “Let me go.”

“I burn for you.” The phaser pressed closer, warning Kirk to play along or suffer the consequence. 

Finally the one approaching drew close enough for Kirk to see black and blue. Spock had worn his uniform to the planet. Unfortunately the feeling of hope was broadcast to the Vulcan touching him.

S’Lar turned and fired, the stun setting having no affect on the advancing First Officer. And without comment Spock reached out to nerve pinch the other Vulcan to the ground.

Kirk covered his face with his hand. “Holy shit, Spock…” Protectively his hand reached down to caress the sore spot where the phaser had left an indentation. “Oh shit…” Fighting back a moment of nausea he stood, naked, one hand covering his mouth the other his belly. Vaguely he became aware that the world was falling away and flipping onto its side. Then things began to swim before his eyes. Words came in echoes and he wanted to ask Spock not to yell but he couldn’t speak. The last thing he heard before the darkness overwhelmed him was, “…to my position! NOW!”

^.~

James T. Kirk woke in a sickbay bed. He knew it was a sickbay bed because he had woken in the same bed many times before. The ceiling was familiar as were the noises and smells. Taking a deep breath he listened to the heart monitor momentarily pip away at a faster rate. There was an undercurrent of something pulsing faster and “swishier” to counterpoint the computerized representation of his heart beat. 

At that moment Leonard McCoy stepped into the room. “What the HELL were you THINKING?” Those normally mocking blue eyes hardened as Bones approached the bed. “You can’t just walk off in your condition! I was gone for five minutes, Jim. FIVE MINUTES and yet you had to go running off with some… separatist hobgoblin on some angel of mercy, blood purging killing spree? You’re DAMN lucky Spock noticed you get up from the table and had the good sense to go after you. Are you really so desperate for his attention? Jim?”

Kirk stared up at McCoy, his vision blurring with unshed tears. 

“What’s wrong now?” Bones checked several readouts. 

“He wanted to kill my baby…” Kirk managed without his voice breaking. “He had a phaser pointed at… I could feel it… He pressed so hard.”

“There, there.” McCoy sighed and wiped away his friend’s tears. “You’re safe. Spock got there in time. He had you brought onboard and dealt with that crazy son of a bitch personally. The Federation took him into custody and your baby’s clan is pissed that an attempt had been made on their life. You’ve got powerful friends.”

“Where’s Spock?” 

“He’s on the bridge. I kicked him out of here two hours ago… reminded him we still have a starship to run.”

Kirk nodded sullenly in understanding. “But why don’t I remember anything?”

Bones crossed his arms over his chest and regarded his friend with an upraised eyebrow he had learned from Spock. “The baby was in distress. Spock thinks it was from your projecting your thoughts. He HEARD you, Jim. When he passed the alleyway he heard your thoughts. The baby amplified them so he could hear them… something about parental bonds. The whole mind voodoo thing exhausted you and you passed out.”

Kirk stared up at his friend, unshed tears in his eyes. “Is Spock mad?”

“He’s concerned. But I managed to convince him that leaving you alone for a few hours while you recovered would be ‘logical.’” 

At that moment the doors of the room opened and Spock stepped in. “I felt his awakening.”

McCoy groaned and threw up his hands. “I wish you’d knock it off! How the hell do you even KNOW that? It’s unnatural!”

Spock ignored the doctor and cocked his head to the side, regarding Kirk. Kirk looked down at his hands, blushing softly from the attention… a warm hunger filling his belly.

“It is perfectly natural for expectant Vulcan parents to be aware of each other through the bond they share with their child.” Spock replied, standing with his hands behind his back.

“Yeah, yeah! He’s awake. Don’t upset him.” McCoy left the room.

Spock and Kirk waited in silence, only the sounds of the heart monitors pierced the calm. “Thank you for… for rescuing me.”

“Captain… I do not understand… why would you follow S’Lar into an alley? Was it for carnal pleasure? How could you risk the safety of… of our child by willingly allowing another Vulcan male to touch you?” Spock’s hands were at his sides, balled up into fists. 

Kirk could see the anger and the tension in his First Officer’s face and it annoyed him. Who was Spock to dictate what species lover he could find for himself? “It doesn’t matter what species he was.”

“Vulcans are territorial about their mates and children.” Spock replied with a flash of anger in his eyes. “You went with another Vulcan male for sex. Your infidelity to me sparked his response to you. It is in the very base of our instincts. We do not share. We are angered when with one who shows such disloyalty to their mate.”

Kirk sat up in bed, ready to leave and storm away. “There’s one thing you’re forgetting, Commander… I am NOT your mate! UHURA is! Talk about fidelity… what about your fidelity to HER?” At that moment the baby gave a mighty kick and Kirk cried out, losing his balance and falling to the floor.

Immediately Spock rushed to Kirk’s aid, attempting to replace Kirk into the bio bed. “Jim…”

“Let go!” Kirk attempted to swat Spock’s hands away but the baby had other ideas, pressing into organs from the inside and causing a great deal of discomfort.

“You must relax. You are upsetting our child. He can feel your turmoil. You must stop and regain control.”

“No! Not unless you admit that Uhura is your mate!”

Spock remained where he was, staring at his captain, pain in his all too human eyes. “I cannot admit that.”

“Why the hell not?” Kirk demanded, attempting to stand on his own.

“Because we have not bonded…

“Technicalities!” Kirk grunted, using the edge of the bio bed as leverage to pull himself up. 

Spock reached out and helped pull Kirk up onto the bed. “I am not yet bonded to anyone. My former fiancée T’Pring died on Vulcan. We had irreconcilable differences making it impossible for us to bond.”

“I’m not talking about her… I’m talking about Uhura. You know… communication’s officer, dark skin, long hair, hates me?”

“The friendship I share with Nyota is deep, but our compatibility as bond mates is… inconsequential.”

“What? Why?” Kirk breathed, rubbing his belly.

“A new potential mate has presented themselves and I find myself… drawn to them.”

“Oh great!” Kirk threw up his hands as he lay back on the bed. “Another one!”

“Indeed.” Spock replied. “Our child needs rest if he is to be born strong. You have had an eventful day. I must return to the bridge.”

Suddenly weary Kirk began to nod off, his stats returning to normal. 

Spock paused at the door, looking back at his sleeping captain. 

^.~

Things returned to normal or as close to normal as was usual aboard a starship. After twenty four hours of medical care Kirk was released to his quarters for another twelve hours before he was allowed to return to duty. Once again Kirk was on Alpha shift as per doctor’s orders.

“I’m not giving up on sleep because you can’t deal with your hobgoblin.” McCoy had growled. “Take it like a man!”

And so Kirk was once again in the Captain’s chair while Spock and Uhura worked nearby. At least now he knew Uhura and Spock were no longer a couple. But Spock had someone else in mind. Who was it?

Kirk glanced at his First Officer who sat, hunched over the read out display. Who would catch his First’s eye? It wasn’t hard to imagine an immaculate Vulcan head bobbing on someone’s cock… the heat of their mouth as they…

“We’re being hailed, Captain.” Uhura announced, forcing Kirk out of his thoughts.

“On screen.” Kirk replied on autopilot.

A ruggedly handsome face grinned at him from the screen. “Captain Kirk, I presume?”

“Captain Kirk here. Who may I ask am I speaking to?”

“I am Janai from Tensia. I spoke to one of your crew members…”

“Pardon. Captain. Janai’s people spoke to me. We are to transport his delegation to the Deniba System.” Spock spoke up, turning to regard the screen and his captain.

“Oh yes. Thank you, Mr. Spock.” Kirk was confused. Spock had made no mention of the transport. “When you are ready, Mr. Janai, we will bring you aboard.”

“Thank you Captain.” Janai replied with a broad smile.

“Transporter room, ready for transport.”

^.~

The delegates freely mingled with the Enterprise crew at the welcoming reception. There was happy chatter on the delegates’ behalf as they circulated the room.

“It would have been nice to know they were coming.” Kirk breathed as he neared his First Officer.

“I apologize, Captain. I had thought that you would still be in sickbay when they arrived.”

“I DO like to know what’s going on with my own ship… even when I’m in sickbay.” Kirk replied, taking a sip of his fruit juice.

“Dr. McCoy made it clear that ship business may have a negative affect on your pregnancy.”

“I…” But at that moment they were interrupted.

“It’s a pleasure to meet you, Captain Kirk!” Janai approached with a grin. “I have heard so many splendid things about you.”

“I’m glad they are all splendid.” Kirk chuckled.

“You’re a lot handsomer in person. Those gorgeous blue eyes… that warrior physique. Indeed you are the picture of Kalos.” Janai beamed.

“Kalos?”

“Forgive me, Captain… but our culture was heavily influenced by Earth’s Classic Greek and Roman principles. Kalos is the outer beauty reflecting the inner beauty.”

“Ah… yes… I remember learning something about that.” Kirk nodded in agreement.

“Very beautiful, indeed…” Janai looked the captain up and down. “Our culture has a refined warrior class. We believe perfect love can only be experienced between brothers-in-arms.” 

“Do they?” Kirk tried to smile politely.

“We freely share what pleasures the Gods have given us.” Janai winked.

“Imagine that…” Kirk breathed, feeling his body react to the words that were clearly meant as a seduction.

A low growl was heard from where Spock stood.

Janai looked surprised. “Commander Spock?”

“Captain Kirk is taken.” Spock growled softly.

“Oh! I hadn’t realized he was…” Janai’s eyes fell to the captain’s belly. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to interfere.”

“He means that I’m pregnant.”

“No, I mean that Captain Kirk already has a warrior mate.”

Kirk turned to glare at his First. “We’ll discuss this LATER, Commander.” 

“I cannot sit back as you blatantly flaunt before a rival male.” Spock replied.

With a smile, Kirk turned his attention to Janai. “Will you please excuse us?”

“Of course!” Janai raised his drink.

Kirk left the reception closely followed by Spock. When they were safely within Kirk’s quarters, away from prying eyes and ears Kirk turned on Spock. “How dare you!”

“How dare you?” Spock replied.

“I was just being polite to our guest… a guest you neglected to inform me was coming. He was telling me about his culture.”

“He was trying to have sexual relations with you.” Spock replied.

Kirk shook his head in frustration. “What does it matter? He’s not Vulcan. I doubt he would have tried to kill me.”

“You are taken.”

“By whom? Your future self? How do I even know that he’s you? You’re not even attracted to men in a sexual way! He could be someone else that looks like you…”

“Is that what confuses you? My attraction to males?”

“And other things like… you don’t even LIKE me. We’re friends but you’re not… You had Uhura! She’s fucking PERFECT! How could you fucking DUMP Uhura? With those legs… and those tits and that brain! Are you INSANE? I’m just… I’m not…” Tears began to form thanks to hormones. “Well… LOOK at me! I’m puffed up like some whale! And I’ve got a DICK! Did you forget that I have a dick? You won’t be nearly so gung ho about this when I try to shove it inside of you.”

“It would be illogical to limit compatibility to one gender. Vulcan bodies are adapted for the possibility of a bondmate in one’s own gender.”

“What?” Kirk replied, confused.

“That is in answer to your statement about having your dick shoved inside of me.”

Kirk blinked a few times. 

“I was well aware of Tensian culture and their sexual practices between warriors. I hoped to keep you away from them. Due to your previous encounters with highly sexualized cultures I felt threatened. It was my attempt to protect both you and our child. As I have stated before… Vulcans do not share their mates.”

“I’m NOT your mate!” Kirk shot back, his fist coming down hard on his desk. Silence stretched as they both stood, facing each other but eyes to the floor. “Besides… you said you were interested in someone else.”

“You hear but you do not comprehend.” Spock whispered with hands balled into fists at his sides. “I am drawn to you. My older self told me that you and I will have a most profound relationship that defines us both.” 

“What? When…?”

“After Nero… I was planning on leaving Starfleet. But he told me… to give you a chance.”

“I… I didn’t know that’s why you came back…”

“Your child is the son of Spock. It does not matter which Spock that is… he is still of my bloodline. The one who sired him is not here… but I am. I will claim him as my own.”

“You… you don’t have to do that.” Kirk sat down at his desk, head in his hands.

“I was told that I could never create offspring. My hybrid DNA would not allow it. But somehow… it has happened. I am to be a father… a responsibility I welcome.”

“But Uhura… I mean she’s more suited to be a mom than I am…”

“Jim…” Spock approached the desk and leaned over it, forcing Kirk to look at him. “Do you find me aesthetically pleasing?”

Mutely Kirk nodded, blue eyes focused on brown.

“Oh, T’hy’la…” Spock breathed, his fingers caressing the side of Kirk’s face, lingering at his psi points.

Kirk blinked and caught Spock’s hand. “Wait! What was that? What did you just call me?”

“T’hy’la.” Spock replied.

“What… what does that mean?”

“In the most general sense it could be defined as ‘soul mate’ but it is so much more to a Vulcan. Historically it was a bond between warriors, deeper than a mating bond. Why do you ask?”

“It’s… what he called me… the other you when he came to me he called me that.”

A momentary smile escaped Spock’s lips as his eyes twinkled with delight, only a quick glimpse of the future Spock. “Jim… I know you. I have always known you and I want you as my own.” His fingertips caressed Kirk’s cheek. “Accept me as your mate.”

Kirk blushed. The attention was thrilling but Kirk was still unsure. The captain gave a small nod and then all at once a heavy Vulcan was in his lap, kissing his breath away. Shortly thereafter he found himself on the floor. “You’re going to squish me.” Kirk chuckled nervously.

“Forgive me, Ashaya.” Spock replied, pulling Kirk back up to his feet and guiding him back to the bed. “I wish for you to claim me now.”

“Claim you?” Kirk asked, watching his First Officer undress hastily but efficiently. “Right now?”

“Before someone else can steal you away from me again.” Spock growled, beginning work on Kirk’s clothing. Successful in his mission, Spock straddled Kirk’s hips, his alien penis hot and heavy on his human’s belly.

Kirk reached down and lightly touched the appendage. It was green in color with double ridges and secreted some sort of lubrication along the shaft as he caressed. It wasn’t something he was prepared for. The sudden turn of events were more than a little surprising and just a little confusing. And yet there was Spock in all his Vulcan Glory straddling his hips, gazing down at him with a small smile on his lips. There was no doubt he loved Spock as a friend and with a bit of a crush on him he never thought he would have a chance to consummate. As to why Spock wanted him, that was a bit bewildering and he felt more than a little unworthy of that desire. His hand squeezed the Vulcan phallus, causing Spock to gasp and push into his hand. Below the warm alien ass his own penis grew hard.

“Do not be afraid, T’hy’la.” Spock breathed. Carefully he sat up and eased himself down on Kirk, his body encasing the captain’s cock in tight coolness. “Claim me.”

At that moment there was a call from the bridge. “Bridge to Captain Kirk.”

Kirk reached out and flicked the switch. “Kirk here.”

“You are needed, Captain, on the Bridge.”

Kirk stared up at the scowling Vulcan that straddled him. “On my way. Kirk out.” For a moment he stayed where he was, hands resting on Spock’s thighs. “Duty calls.”

“Yes… Duty.” Spock continued to scowl, his voice cold. 

“Let me up? I need to get dressed.”

Spock carefully moved from where he sat, allowing the captain to get up. 

Kirk hastily pulled on his underwear and trousers followed by his shirt. “I hope it’s not too important.”

“No… of course not…” Spock spoke with certain amount of venom.

After pulling on his boots, Kirk headed for the door. “You’re not… too upset… are you?”

“Why should I be upset, Captain?” Spocks words chilled Kirk to the bone, reminding him of the Vulcan who had tried to strangle him at the start of their acquaintance.

“Um… no reason… Bye, then!” Quickly he made his escape before Spock came after him. In the turbo lift he tried to compose himself, his dick still hard and damp from being inside of Spock. “Oh… Shit…” Had he really just abandoned Spock after penetrating him? The baby seemed agitated, beating up his kidneys. 

^.~

“So… you say your partner is on our ship?” Kirk queried the young, proud, scantily clad warrior before him.

“That is correct, Captain.” Ketala replied, raising his chin in defiance. 

“Which of our guests is he?” Kirk asked wearily. The baby seemed to be dancing on his spine and he was having trouble focusing on the newcomer.

“Janai.” Ketala answered, eyeing Kirk’s belly.

Kirk checked the ship’s chronometer. “He should still be at the gathering. I will take you to him.”

“Thank you, Captain.”

As Kirk marched through the ship he was surprised to find a dressed Spock waiting to intercept him in a hall. The Vulcan marched in silence just behind Kirk’s right shoulder, almost a little too close. Finally reaching the festivities, Kirk entered, followed closely by Spock and Ketala.

“Janai!” Ketala approached the older man who was busy smiling at one of the engineers.

“Ketala? What are you doing here?” Janai asked, nearly spilling his drink.

“I am at your side… where I should be. You left me behind!” Ketala replied indignantly.

Janai gave the engineer a regretful look before turning his attention to his partner as they began to quarrel in a corner of the room.

Kirk watched them for only a moment. The baby’s movements made it difficult to concentrate. A presence behind his right shoulder bumped him and the baby settled down. Absently Kirk reached down to touch his belly. Exhaustion was beginning to set in and he stifled a yawn.

“You should go to bed, Captain.” Spock stated simply. “Our child needs you to rest.”

“He keeps kicking me in the spine. I don’t know if I’ll get any rest…” 

“He can feel your emotions. You are troubled and that troubles him. He needs both of his parents to…”

“You’re not the father!” Kirk hissed, losing his temper. “And you’re not my mate!”

Spock blinked, a moment of vulnerable pain in his eyes before he carefully controlled it. “You said…” But by that time Kirk had left the room.

^.~

Kirk glanced at the chronometer, exhausted and sore. The baby had abused his insides for most of the night. “I’m sorry… what did you say?”

Uhura’s voice came through the speaker. “There’s a transmission from New Vulcan, sir.” The “sir” was spoken with a great deal of venom that made Kirk cringe. It seemed Uhura knew about the argument he had with Spock. 

“Put it through…” Kirk climbed out of bed and ran a hand through his hair before sitting at his desk and pressing the button.

Old Spock stared back at him with fondness in his all too human eyes. “I hear congratulations are in order, Jim.”

Kirk shook his head and tried desperately to fight back the tears that threatened to fall. “It’s horrible… HORRIBLE!” Wiping at his eyes he tried to hide his pain. At that moment the baby kicked and he burst into tears. 

“You are having a difficult pregnancy.” It was a statement rather than a question.

“I think he’s bruised every organ I own.” Kirk replied. “The only time he stops is when Spock is around… and I can’t rely on that!”

“Why not, Jim?”

Kirk shook his head again, miserable. “He’s not the father… not really… he keeps going on about how I’m his mate and… and this is just so messed up!”

“Why is it ‘messed up’?”

“He doesn’t really love me. A couple of months ago he was madly in love with Uhura. Once he found out that an older version of himself did this to me he’s been… the only reason he wants to be with me is because I’m pregnant with his child. One day he’s going to wake up and realize it’s not enough.”

There was pity in the old Vulcan’s face. “Is there anything I can do to help ease your suffering?’

“Did this happen to your James Kirk?”

Spock Prime shook his head. “I was not even aware a human male could get pregnant.”

“So… this is only happening in my universe?”

“What is it you wish to know?”

“Well… the Spock that zapped me came from a future… it may be mine or some other James Kirk’s.”

“I have never encountered another pregnant James Kirk. As I said, I was not aware it was even a possibility.”

The baby kicked again and Kirk gasped, rubbing his belly.

“If the child is part Vulcan they require both of their parents to be present to thrive in the gestation process.”

“Yeah… the other Spock told me something like that…” Kirk gasped, his lungs under assault. 

“Your discomfort concerns me greatly. I do not wish for you to suffer. Perhaps it would be beneficial to allow your Spock’s assistance until the child is born.”

“You mean I can’t do this on my own?” Kirk was hurt. “I don’t want to get… attached… when I can’t…” In that moment the baby gave a kick that made him completely lose his breath, enough so he saw stars. Vaguely he was aware of the elder Spock pressing buttons on his side of the link.

“Ambassador Spock to Enterprise, Captain Kirk requires assistance! I repeat, medical emergency to captain’s quarters!”

And then the room went dark.

^.~

Kirk woke up again in sick bay. His insides were sore and he attempted to shift them to alleviate the pain.

“Do not move a muscle!” McCoy admonished. 

Kirk lay still and stared up at the ceiling.

“What the hell were you doing? Your child was in medical distress! The poor kid tried to jump ship so to speak. This flimsy version of a uterus you have growing inside of you isn’t the heavy duty one women get… You can’t be messing around!”

“It’s hardly my fault, Bones! The kid was… He won’t sit still. I’m being beaten up from the inside.”

“Oh sure… blame a poor, innocent baby!” McCoy muttered, checking Kirk’s vitals.

The tears began to flow from Kirk’s eyes, feeling a tight pain in his chest. 

“I was just messing with you… no need to cry. I know you’re having difficulty with the pregnancy. It’s because the uterus you have isn’t really babyproof. It’s an alien contraption to artificially make a man pregnant with a little hormone gland to maintain the pregnancy. That’s all! Basically it’s just a little bag in your body keeping your baby cozy… like an organic stasis chamber. Once I cut you open to deliver the baby it will have to be removed.”

Kirk wiped his tears away, feeling like a weak fool for being so emotional.

McCoy gently patted Kirk’s shoulder. “There, there… I’m going to put you back under for a while… I’m putting you back on medical leave. You need to rest.” 

With the soft hiss of the medication Kirk fell back asleep.

^.~

When Kirk woke again he felt much better. The baby was calm. Although the ceiling told him he was in another part of the medical bay, a place he wasn’t familiar with. Looking around he found himself in a private room. The chair beside him was occupied by a man with black hair and pointed ears, using the edge of Kirk’s bed as a pillow with one hand touching Kirk’s belly.

Spock woke and straightened himself up, not moving his hand away. Blinking away his own sleep he stared at Kirk. “You do not think you can keep me.”

“What?”

“I talked to my counterpart. He relayed some of your concerns. You fear that I will leave you after our child is born.”

“Less than a month ago you were still dating Uhura. And then you left her. What stops you from doing the same to me?” 

Spock stood up, his hand still on Kirk’s abdomen. “You need me.”

“She needed you too! And once this baby is born…”

“You will still need me.”

“Until you find someone else…”

“Jim… if I take you as my mate I will not leave you.”

Kirk shook his head. “Everyone leaves.”

Spock reached up to lightly touch Kirk’s face. “What do I have to do to prove myself, Ashayam?”

“I… don’t think you can. You’re… you’re only interested in me because I’m pregnant with your child.”

“That is not the only reason…”

“What?”

“My counterpart told me I belong with you. My destiny is at your side… with you I will be complete. With you I will find ‘home.’ I lost my world… but you are my home.” Spock’s thumb lightly caressed Kirk’s cheekbone. “Will you be my mate?”

“I… don’t know what to say.”

“Say yes.” Spock whispered.

“Do you… love?”

Spock looked surprised at the question. “Yes.” Leaning in he kissed Kirk’s lips, taking his breath away.

Kirk broke off their kiss. “Say it.”

“Wani ra yana ro aisha.” Spock whispered against Kirk’s lips. 

Something warm and pleasurable seemed to slide down Kirk’s spine, settling in his groin. “Oh Gods…”

“I will cherish thee forever. Parted but never apart… our souls one.” Spock kissed again, plundering Kirk’s mouth in a way that Uhura had taught him humans enjoyed. Pulling away he panted for breath. “Jim… I belong with you. Say yes.”

“Yes…” Kirk breathed.

Resting their foreheads together, Spock took deep breaths as if to steady himself. “I will let you rest.” Pulling away he briefly touched Kirk’s belly. “Rest, little one.”

Kirk began to feel drowsy and fell back asleep.

^.~

After almost a week of bed rest and with some begging and pleading Kirk was released to his own quarters under the care of the Vulcan who promised to alert the doctor should anything happen.

“This is really important, Spock. Jim is a delicate flower. He needs to be nurtured or else he will find a way to make a mess of everything. We all want this pregnancy to end with a healthy baby and a healthy captain, don’t we?”

“That is correct, Doctor.”

“Good. I’m glad I can make myself clear. If he has so much as a sniffle over some heart ache you made for him I’m going to come beat your ass. You got that?”

“Beat… my ass?”

“Hurt him and I’ll hurt you… Comprendez?”

“I… understand.” Spock replied. Carefully he escorted Kirk back to his cabin and made sure the man was comfortable in bed. “Do you require anything?”

Kirk shook his head.

Spock lingered a moment longer by the bed, biting his lip and frowning slightly. “Shall I undress?”

Kirk blinked up at the Vulcan, confused. “What?”

“We have yet to consummate our union.”

“Consummate?”

Spock lowered himself to kneel before Kirk to look him in the eye. “Mate.”

Kirks eyes went wide just a little bit. “Is it allowed?”

“Why would it not be?”

“The baby…?”

“The baby will find comfort in our union.”

“Oh…” Kirk stared down at his swollen belly, lightly touching it.

“You are apprehensive with our union…” 

“What? Why would you say that?”

“I am doubtful your past lovers had to beg for your attention as I have.”

“You loved someone else.”

“I was not aware of where I belonged.”

“Don’t say that… it’s not like I own you. You could have stayed with Uhura.” 

“From the moment I first touched you… when you accused me of hating my own mother…”

“Yeah… I’m really sorry about that… the other Spock said I had to because…”

“You imprinted yourself upon me. I returned to the Enterprise for you… for what my counterpart promised we could be. If I let you go I would lose a part of myself I never knew existed outside of my own body. And when I found out you were pregnant…”

“Sorry…”

“I was hurt. The child was Vulcan. I felt… betrayed. But I resolved to protect the child as my own since your Vulcan mate was not there. And then I found out he was mine…”

“Or an alternate future you…”

“That does not matter to me, Ashayam. This child is mine. He could be fathered by my counterpart and he would still be mine.”

“I was afraid that you and Uhura would take him from me. He’s the child you couldn’t have…” 

“I regret ever giving you that impression.” Spock lightly touched Kirk’s belly. “I only want to raise him with you.”

“Oh… Spock.” Kirk gently touched Spock’s face. 

“Shall I remove my uniform now?”

Kirk nodded. “Yes.”

“You are on medical leave… no more comm signals.” Spock stood and began to undress, carefully folding his uniform.

“What if they call you?”

“Then I shall tell them I am occupied with my mate.” Spock replied and got up onto the bed. Gently he began to undress his captain.

Kirk tried to cover his belly with his hands. “I’m afraid I’m a little bigger than I was last time.”

“You are carrying my child. Why would I find that unappealing?” Setting aside the last of Kirk’s clothing Spock immediately wrapped the other man in his arms. 

Kirk broke a little, feeling the cool arms pull him to a firm chest. “Please… please don’t leave me…” Sobs wracked his pregnancy softened body. 

“I have no wish to.” Spock breathed, pulling Kirk closer. “Ashayam… I have you. Please do not weep.”

“I can’t help it…” Kirk sobbed, pressing his wrist into his eye sockets. “I got pregnant… and I knew it was yours… and you were with Uhura… I had no right… no RIGHT to intrude on that! I thought I would be alone.”

“Never alone…”

“But I didn’t know that! You were in love… I ruined it for you!” Kirk continued to weep. 

“There is something you do not understand.”

Kirk shook his head.

“You make me feel things, Jim. Anger… sadness… friendship… passion! I cannot control these emotions even though it is in my nature to try. You bring out my human side.”

Kirk burst into fresh tears.

“Weep no more. This should be a time to celebrate.”

But Kirk could not stop. The emotional side of pregnancy took its toll.

“Doctor McCoy has threatened to kick my ass if you continue to weep.”

Kirk gave a soft chuckle through his tears imagining that. 

“How do you want me?” Spock whispered helpless to stop Kirk’s tears.

Kirk shook his head, wiping away his tears. “I want to feel you. I want to know you’re there… that you haven’t left me.”

Spock frowned and glanced down at Kirk’s belly. 

“It’s not too demanding… is it?”

Spock absently shook his head as he reached down to regretfully squeeze Kirk’s genitals.

“Oh… fuck… Spock.”

Spock frowned in concentration as if puzzling out the nature of the universe.

“What’s wrong?”

“I had hoped…”

“Spock…”

With a sigh Spock pulled his hand away. “As you wish, Ashayam.” Touching himself he used his own natural fluids to cover his hand before returning his fingers to a place between Kirk’s legs. As a finger sank in, he closed his eyes… a look of deep concentration on his face as his own erection engorged fully.

“Spock? Does it hurt?”

“Forgive me, Jim… but perhaps you are not aware… a Vulcan’s hands are very sensitive. I am inside of you. Your heat…” Spock bit his lip, using his other hand to stave off his own orgasm. “I do not know how long I can last… if I am able to prepare you sufficiently.”

“Oh.” And really that was all Kirk could say. His mind rebooted from the hard crash of seeing Spock come undone just with a little fingering. “Do you want to do it like this?”

Spock shook his head. “I need more.”

Kirk nodded in understanding and gently reached down to pull Spock out. “I can do it.” Using the oils Spock left behind he began to open himself. 

Spock’s eyes widened, watching his digits disappear within his captain’s body. “I… cannot watch.” Shutting his eyes he looked away. “I am sorry… I was not prepared…”

“It’s alright, really it is… You don’t have to be embarrassed. We all have our kinks… yours just happens to be… fingers in my ass.” Kirk chuckled as he worked himself open.

“You are teasing me!” Spock protested.

“Spock… Open your eyes.”

Spock obeyed and stared back at Kirk with perfect trust and devotion, staring the other man in the eyes.

Kirk pulled his fingers out and lightly slid them down Spock’s chest, making the Vulcan shiver. “Do you really want me?”

“Yes.” 

“Even though I’m cocky, arrogant and reckless?”

Spock nodded.

“You can still have Uhura.”

“I want you, Jim.” Spock’s voice was low, gravely. It took on qualities of his elder counterpart as he stared at Kirk almost hungrily. “I need you.” His words were soft, barely there.

Kirk’s oily hand shifted to rest on Spock’s hip, guiding him into place. 

Spock pushed in, gasping sharply as he entered Kirk for the first time. “You are so… hot… like home.”

“Surely you’ve fucked other humans…”

Spock growled softly and kept his eyes on Kirk’s face as he gave an experimental thrust. “Unlike you my sexual experiences have been… limited.” 

“So you haven’t fucked Uhura?”

“I did not… say that.” With each pause he gave another thrust.

“Then why is my body temperature so… shocking?” Kirk’s pauses came with grunts in response to each thrust.

“It is not your temperature… it is you.” Spock leaned down and kissed Kirk’s lips. “I am inside of you… for the first time.” With a soft whimper he began to speed up. 

“Why? I’m no one special…”

“Jim!” Spock shook his head. “Do not attempt argue with me while we engage in coitus!” It was a simple demand, sounding almost comical as it came out of a clearly aroused Vulcan. The prim words punctuated with deep thrusts.

Kirk fought not to giggle at the word choice. But within a few strokes his own body was caught up with Spock’s movements. Perhaps he should learn to think less while someone was fucking him… he was missing out on all of the sensations by trying to have a conversation.

“We must… meld…” Spock grunted with the strain of his movements. “I must…” A hand groped up to Kirk’s face to find his psi points. “Confirm…”

“Yes, Spock…” Kirk replied.

Spock plunged into Kirk’s mind and in one instant they were one being in two bodies. Kirk could feel Spock’s arousal and his need to fit them together in a bond that would not break. Somewhere between them a third soul was reaching out for both of them and Kirk knew it was their child. Between Kirk and Spock was a shining golden thread. It vibrated with intensity as Kirk watched. “You are not alone.” Spock’s voice whispered. And then there was an orgasm.

Kirk fell out of the meld, feeling like his testicles had crawled up inside of his body to escape as rope upon rope of ejaculate pulsed from him. “Fuck!” As he returned to his own body he became aware that Spock had a look of agony on his face as something cool entered his bowels. Spock’s face gradually relaxed as he rested against Kirk’s chest.

Spock finally pulled himself back together and pulled back a little to give his human some air. “You still do not completely believe in my sincerity.”

“No one has ever really wanted me before…”

Spock lightly traced Kirk’s cheekbone with his fingertips. “Then I shall strive to prove myself every day from this day forward. Someday you will believe…”

Kirk swallowed hard. “Someday… if you teach me.”

“First lesson…” Spock whispered as he leaned down to kiss his bondmate, pushing his tongue past the other man’s lips to take his mouth hungrily.

Between them the baby was content.

^.~

Spock held the tiny infant wrapped in a blanket. They stared at each other, part of the bonding process between Vulcan parents and their offspring. 

On the other side of the room McCoy busily put James Kirk back together. The artificial uterus lay in a pan, ready for dissection. After making sure all of Kirk’s internal organs were intact from the invasive surgery to remove the baby McCoy started to seal him up, running a dermal regenerator over the scar. “There we are… just like new.” Proud of his work he released the quarantine force field that kept contaminates from entering his surgery space. “Would you like to see your baby now?”

Kirk stiffly attempted to sit up. “Yes… that would be nice.”

“That’s your cue, Spock…” McCoy called as he picked up the pan with the artificial uterus. “Take it easy… you just had surgery.”

“Yeah, yeah…” Kirk waved him off as Spock approached to place a tiny baby in his arms. “Oh look! He has his daddy’s ears!” 

“Vulcan traits tend to dominate when mixed with another species.”

“Yes but he’s three quarters human, isn’t he?” Kirk lightly touched the baby’s cheek, enraptured. “So you were the one beating me up from the inside?”

Spock raised an eyebrow. “He cannot speak yet.”

“I know that…” Kirk mused. 

Spock stood close to his mate and child, their family bond made him feel content… peaceful.

“Will I be a good enough father?”

“You will be a good father, Ashayam.”

“How do you know?”

“My future self entrusted you with this child. He knows who what sort of father you would become when he gave you this child.”

“I’m still afraid.”

“Do not be… I am here.”

Kirk reached out and touched Spock’s hand as if to reassure himself of that statement. 

“I am here…” Spock repeated, holding his T’hy’la’s hand. Their fingers slid together, causing the human to shiver in delight. “Lesson twenty seven.”

“Odd… I could have sworn finger caresses were lessons five, seven and eighteen.” 

“This one is different, Jim… reassuring you of my affection after the birth of our child.”

“Ah yes…” Kirk smirked and allowed his fingers to be stroked as he smiled down at his child. “Welcome aboard, little one.” 

\--Fin

**Author's Note:**

> You guys get to see it as one single block of writing... I stretched this out over the course of a year for the people at the other archive. I blame my computer HD dieing in the process and then losing my file for a few months when I switched to the new computer.


End file.
